Professor Ratigan's New Plan
Professor Ratigan's plan was foiled by Rei! Meanwhile, back at the ship, Lucifer was stalking around the ship in circles. The rat professor was feeling ill because he had caught a cold from all that swimming along with a headache due to bumping his head on the wall. He has a hot water bottle on his head and a red towel wrapped around him with his paws in a bucket of hot water. "That cursed Rei Pan!" Ratigan sniffled, "Making a fool out of me!" All of a sudden, the rat sneezed loudly before splashing his head in the hot water. He lifted his head out and held it, groaning in pain. "Oh! my head!" Although his head hurt, it was nothing when came banging on the door, annoying Ratigan. It was Fidget making that racket. He was hammering a "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door. A rat named Sullivan came in with a hot water kettle for Fidget to give to the professor. Sullivan: Oh, a rat's life is a wonderful life "Your hot water, Fidget!" Sullivan called before Fidget shushed him. "The poor professor has a splitting headache!" Fidget said, "We mustn't annoy him." He didn't notice Ratigan open the door as he banged the hammer hard on the rat's head. The hammer vibrated with Fidget still holding it. Ratigan, who was dazed, spun circles in his room and collapsed in his chair, completely dazed with one paw in the bucket and one paw out. Fidget entered the room with the kettle Sullivan gave him and looked at Ratigan. Although we didn't see it, a dazed Professor Ratigan smiled goofily. "Well, professor, it's nice to see you smiling again!" said Fidget, as he put Ratigan's other paw in the bucket, shook a thermometer, and put it in his mouth, "Brings back the good old days when we were living a healthy, normal life: scuttling ships, cutting throats! Oh, professor, why don't we put to sea again?" Then he put hot water from the kettle in the bucket. "You know, there's trouble brewing on the island - women trouble!" He didn't know that he was putting an awful lot of hot water in the bucket, making the water in the bucket too hot. "I wouldn't want this to go any farther, but Bill the Lizard told me that Old Blind Joe told him that he heard that Rei has banished Jeanette Miller." At this, the thermometer broke because the water was so hot, and Ratigan bolted from his chair, screaming in pain because his paws were red-hot. "WHOHOHOHOA!" Fidget fell backwards, and Ratigan, who was very angry, grabbed him with the empty kettle over his eyes. "WHY YOU GIBBERING, LITTLE IMBECILE, I--''' But then, his anger turned to surprise as he slowly lifted the kettle from his face. "Did you say Rei has banished Jeanette Miller?" "Aye-aye, professor. Yes." "But why?" "On account of Kilala, professor. Jeanette tried to do her in, but Rei saved her. Jeanette's terribly jealous..." "Well, well!" Ratigan said, with a scheming look in his eyes. "That's why we ought to leave, professor," said Fidget. "This ain't no place for a respectable criminal mind." But Ratigan had no attention of leaving Neverland yet after getting rid of Rei. Then Ratigan had an idea. "THAT'S IT, FIDGET! THAT'S IT!" "I'm glad you agree, professor." Fidget said, thinking they might be leaving. "Quick," Ratigan said, letting the towel fall on the floor. "My cape! My best black cape!" "Aye, aye, sir," Fidget said, as he dressed Ratigan in his cape. "The sooner we get going, the better." Fidget moved Ratigan to the mirror. "Ah, yes, a jealous female can be tricked into anything. My case of hooks!" he ordered, whacking Fidget in the face. "Aye, aye, professor," said Fidget, as he got the rat's case of hooks. "Here you are, sir. Your Sunday set, sir." Ratigan took off his silver hook and replaced it with a gold one. He also put a shining ruby ring on the hook. "If we impress the chipette, convince her we're eager to help her, the wench may chart our course to a certain hiding place." "Our best hiding place is the Spanish Main, sir." Fidget informed him, as he walked out the door, "I'll set our course..." But Ratigan grabbed the peg-legged bat with his hook. "And where do you think you are going?" Ratigan asked, poking his nose. "To tell the animals we sailed the tide, sir." Ratigan shook his head. "Uh-uh. You will go ashore, pick up Jeanette Miller, and bring her to me." Then he threw him down and yelled, "UNDERSTAAAAAAAND??????????!!!!!!'''" The force of his yell, knocked the bat into his rowboat. "Aye, aye, sir." Fidget said, as he rowed to the island. Category:Fan Fiction